Find and share the positives about a child's learning, behaviour and experiences. ... Be open and honest. ... Think before you speak, especially when you're talking with parents about difficult or sensitive issues. Ask for parents' input. ... Let parents make the decisions.

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Effective communication builds understanding and trust. And when you and parents understand and trust each other, you’ll all be better able to work together to support children’s wellbeing and development. For professionals working with parents, a positive partnership means sharing knowledge and experience to understand a child’s situation, and it can lead to developing plans together to support the child. Listening to parents Listening is the foundation of effective communication. When you listen well, you get more information about children and their families. You also get the full benefit of parents’ in-depth knowledge of their children. And you show parents that you value their experience, ideas and opinions and take their concerns seriously. Here are some ideas for listening well: Let parents know you’re listening and interested by nodding or saying ‘Uh huh’ occasionally. Let parents finish what they’re saying before you speak. Then summarise what parents have said, and check that you’ve understood correctly. Check on the feeling as well as the content of what parents have said. For example, ‘Am I right in saying that you felt upset when the other parent told Taj to stop shouting?’ Use open-ended questions to get more information if you need it. Open-ended questions give people a chance to expand on what they’re saying rather than just saying ‘yes’ or ‘no’. For example, ‘What sort of things did Taj do when he was being naughty?’ Try to understand parents’ perspectives, even if you disagree with what they’re saying. Put yourself in their shoes. For example, ‘It sounds like you felt judged as a parent’. Speaking with parents In every interaction with parents, one of your goals is to strengthen your partnership with them. You’re more likely to achieve this goal if you consistently speak to parents in a clear, respectful and considerate way. Here are some ideas for this kind of speaking: Find and share the positives about a child’s learning, behaviour and experiences. For example, ‘EJ did a great job of sitting still for two minutes in class today. It’s a big step forward for her’. Be open and honest. Give parents accurate information on what you observe. For example, ‘After a couple of minutes, EJ started pushing the child next to her’. Think before you speak, especially when you’re talking with parents about difficult or sensitive issues. Ask for parents’ input. For example, ‘How can we help EJ learn to take part in group work without distracting other children?’ Let parents make the decisions. You can suggest ideas, but it’s up to parents to decide what to do next. For example, ‘We could try a behaviour chart. Or EJ could start with short group activities and build up to longer ones. What do you think?’ If you’re not sure about what to say next or how to say it, you don’t have to respond straight away. For example, ‘I’d like to think about that more. Can I get back to you tomorrow?’ Use ordinary, everyday language that parents can understand. Parents are likely to find professional jargon daunting and alienating, so it’s best avoided. Raising concerns with parents As a professional, there might be times when you need to raise concerns with parents about a child’s behaviour, wellbeing or development. A problem-solving approach will help you and parents work together to address concerns. This approach involves: identifying the problem brainstorming as many solutions as possible jointly evaluating the pros and cons deciding on a solution to try putting the solution into action reviewing the solution after a period of time. One of the keys to this approach is talking about concerns when they come up. Problems usually don’t go away by themselves. And if you leave them to escalate they might be more difficult to repair later. Here are some tips for putting this approach into action: Prepare for conversations about difficult issues. This is because parents can feel upset and stressed by these conversations. If you think ahead about what you need to say and about the most sensitive and respectful way to say it, it can help your discussion go well. Try to schedule a time when parents are most available. For example, if you’re a child care educator or a teacher, this might be at pick-up and drop-off times. Or it might be best to call parents during the day. Discuss concerning behaviour without judgment. Try to focus on facts and whether the behaviour is appropriate. For example, ‘Ben drew on the wall and said that another child did it. This behaviour isn’t OK’. Explain what might contribute to the behaviour. This can help you and parents work out how to change the behaviour. For example, ‘Starting school can be challenging. Children often feel worried about getting into trouble’. Check what parents think about the issue. Remember that perceptions of what’s appropriate can differ between cultures or contexts. For example, ‘How does your family handle it when children don’t tell the truth?’ Offer realistic strategies suited to each family. For example, if a child needs to make new friends but she gets stressed in public, parents might start by inviting other children for playdates at home.

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